Take O take the bloat away
That so richly was heaped on,
Remove those stripes, bring back grey,
Stop this blurry aqua-con;
But the AHIGs bring again, bring again,
Seals of trust, but sealed in vain, sealed in vain.

(Shakespeare)

In honor of Maurice Gibb.

How Can You Mend This OS Farce


I can think of younger days
When sensible GUI’s
Was everything a Mac provided you
Who’d have known Steve Jobs would borrow
A graying, old OS and make it dog slow?

And how can you mend a broken app?
How can you stop the bloat that bogs you down?
How can you stop prefs from defying?
What makes the ball go round?
How’s Jaguar more than AIM?
How can this “Mac” compete with Win?
Please help me mend these fuzzy fonts
And let me see again

I can still feel the breeze
As X-Men drop to their knees
They claim more memory would make it fly
We could see past their bravado
Don’t you say a word or out of FixIt you go

And how could I mend this tasteless art?
How can you stop “OS Bozo the Clown?”
How can you s’plain all this pre-binding?
Who said this crap’s was sound?

How can you mend this crawling LAN?
How can you empty this trash bin?
Please help me mend This OS Farce
And let me live again

Hey Robby, dat's bootiful man. Sniff, sniff, hey man 'scuse me. Really man, sniff. I can't talk no more.

quote:

---

Originally posted by HighHopes:
Hey Robby, dat's bootiful man. Sniff, sniff, hey man 'scuse me. Really man, sniff. I can't talk no more.

---

Hey HH, I knew that would touch your heart. I actually had a hard time getting past the image of some of our X-men brethren dropping to their knees without bawling like a baby.

Dockodils by Foolsaqua

Oft, when behind my Mac I cry
In vacant or in desperate mood,
X flashes upon that inward eye
Which is the curse of solitude,
And then my heart with aqua fills,
And bounces with the Dockodils.

(Wordsworth)

[This message was edited by yabor on Sat June 07 2003 at 03:04 PM.]

quote:

---

I actually had a hard time getting past the image of some of our X-men brethren dropping to their knees without bawling like a baby.

---

Really? I kinda natually always pictured them that way.

Bloats

Why should I let the toad Aqua
Squat on my Mac?
Can't I use thalo.net as a hammer
And drive the brute back?

The Legacy Finder it soils
With its bloat-bringing poison -
Just for some digikid thrills!
That's out of proportion.

(Philip Larkin)

Et in Aquaria Steve's Ego.

quote:

---

In honor of Maurice Gibb.

---

You're a natural, SR. I'm now half tempted to do:

I, I, I, I, stayin’ in 9, stayin in 9

quote:

---

Squat on my Mac?
Can't I use thalo.net as a hammer
And drive the brute back?

---

Jan, you've obviously taken your degree in literature and shot it all to hell. Way to go!

quote:

---

I, I, I, I, stayin’ in 9, stayin in 9

---

excellent!


Well you can tell by the way I used to balk
I'm an X-critic man, was banned from "Talk"


nah

quote:

---

Well you can tell by the way I used to balk
I'm an X-critic man, was banned from "Talk"

---

X is loud and the GUI's torn
It's been dicked around like hardcore porn

Sad Macs

Groping for thalo.net after a piss
I boot into Jaguar, and am startled by
The silly stripes, the Finder's sloppiness.

F*ck the dock: photo-realistic icons try
To bounce into a blurry sky.
There's something laughable about this,

The way everything here works ever so slow
In spite, or because of, the unix below;
O wolves of protected memory! O brave new OS! No.

(Philip Larkin)

[This message was edited by yabor on Sun June 08 2003 at 03:04 PM.]

quote:

---

F*ck the dock: photo-realistic icons try
To bounce into a blurry sky.
There's something laughable about this,

---

LMAO. Spoken with such a pleasing mixture of eloquence and raunch, as if tip-toeing threw a dewy meadow and then unexpectedly smooshing a cow patty between one's toes.

Endsteviecon

This thing of Stevie is a toy for ever:
Its hatefulness increases; pity it will never
Pass into nothingness; but still will keep
A screen blurry for us, and a sleep
Full of nightmares, and pain, and loud cursing.

(John Keats)

[This message was edited by yabor on Sun June 08 2003 at 04:40 PM.]

X in Stevie's orchard
Should now be rooted sure,
To cast abroad its iApps
And kill 9 and endure.

Close is the candy clustered
And light the i-tunes wave,
And deep the root is planted
In NeXT's corrupting grave.

(Housman)

Fidgety, widgety Dock
The mouse can't drag and drop
The icons parted like someone farted
Fidgety, widgety Dock

"AHIGs? AHIGs?? I doan got to show you no AHIGs! WE DOAN NEED NO STINKIN' AHIGs!!"



Markle

The thoughts of others
Were light and fleeting,
Of AHIGs' meeting
Or speed or fame.

Mine were of trouble,
And mine were steady,
So I was ready
When Panther came.

(Housman)

OS X Shareware

The toil of geeks that be
Helps not the primal fault;
It rains into the sea,
And still the sea is salt.

(Housman)

[This message was edited by yabor on Mon June 09 2003 at 05:48 PM.]

[This message was edited by yabor on Mon June 09 2003 at 05:51 PM.]

Brotherhood

Thalo.net again: lurking at ten past three
(Surely Brad's praised my last post by now?),
My iMac hot as a bakery,
The drink gone dead (I should quit, but how?)
And the usual pain, like dysentery.

Someone else posting about chicks and balls,
Someone else drowned in Kimberly's lash-wide stare,
And me supposed to be ignorant,
Or find it funny, or not to care.
Even . . . but why put it into words?

(Philip Larkin)