Only kidding. No cat thread.

Unless of course some brother wants one, lol. My cat has been dead six years, and I must say, the cat-free life is the life for me.

Then maybe you should have named this:

"The Dead Cat Thread"

Watch it, cat people are almost as easy to cheese off as X-Men.

I have a neighbor, the quintessential cat person. I'm convinced she has what at first I jokingly called "Feline Munchausen by Proxy Syndrome" but sometimes I wonder if my intuition wasn't um, dead on. It's kind of a creepy theory, an uncomfortable look at human nature.

Basically, this chick rescues all kinds of stray cats, but they all end up dying under mysterious circumstances after she runs up huge vet bills supposedly trying to "save" them. Sometimes it takes months, sometimes weeks. When the cats first show up around the neighborhood, they look fine and healthy. Maybe a little down on their luck, but a good six or seven of their nine lives intact.

But holy crap, after she gets her uh, claws in them... well, first there's a brief honeymoon period where they're pampered and well-fed and think they hit kitty pay dirt... then they somehow manage to come down with some huge illness, and then slowly die of horrible afflictions. Feline Leukemia, Kitty AIDS, cancer, all sorts of shit. My theory is the outpouring of sympathy from the community is what fuels this. Every time she gets a new one, I secretly nickname it either Hansel or Gretel and tell them to watch their backs. We're on like Hansel III and Gretel VI.

Of course nobody believes me. My block is loaded with cat people and they all won't see it. They refuse to believe that human beings are capable of this. They all think I'm kidding, because unfortunately I find this darkly humorous. But the truth is, I'm really I'm only half-kidding. Sometimes I'm creeped out. Everyone thinks the woman is a saint. I actually ran this scenario by the ASPCA and they said they'd keep a discreet eye on her.

Holy Cripes, now we are talking about cats! Who started this? It was that damned Rico with his Snobby of Robby quote. Just look what you've done now Rico! You should be ashamed!

My fault! Snobbie started it. The Yankees have not been in first place all season. Snobbies therapist must have made a mint this season.

Oh man brother thalo you are definitely right on with your hypothesis. I had a roommate who had a cat. It was not a bad cat. Male neutered. I can't remember it's name but I called it Black Cat because it was black. My roommate all of a sudden brings in a stray cat. Little female white black tan patchs. I called it New Cat.

Turns out the little thing was pregnant. So over night we went from one cat to two cats to eight cats. I was shocked how many kittens showed up. New Cat was so small it was hard to believe. There was a male orange taby in the litter my roommate really liked and showed the most affection too. In a short time that orange taby was on the brink of death. My roommate then goes out and gets formula bottles to "save" the little guy. I told her I thought she should just take the other kittens away and let him suckle on his own with the mother for a while. He made it in the end because of it. Brother thalo it sounds like you are living the Stephen King version of my experience.

When I worked for a plumber we did work in a house that was filled with cats. I mean filled. At least 50 on the first floor. I never went up stairs. Oddly the basement was very normal clean well organized. The stench in the rest of the house was overwhelming.

Don't try to fob off the blame on missing members. That reminds me; where the hell is the Snobby One anyway?

Wait a minute, wait a minute, now you're talking about cats. Good Lord what's happening to us! It's the Invasion of the Bodysnatchers all over again. Someone help us. Please have mercy on us!

LMFAO!

Don't listen to brother Double-H, Rico, this is all his fault. A single post isn't a cat thread. It took a responder to make it a thread, so technically Double-H started thalo.net's first cat thread. It would have died as a simple gag had he not decided to post in it. Now we're stuck riffing on cats

You're the responder thalo. You're the guy who responded to Rico's quote by the Earl of Snobby by starting a cat thread. Rico started it and you perpetuated it. And now, like the Frankenstein monster, it lives, it lives. Nothing can stop it. It seeks to destroy us all.

I've just learned the best way to get a cat thread going is to have the attitude that you'd rather die than be one of those forum sites where people talk about their cats. It was the same way with having a lounge forum, which I didn't want either (believing as I do that there's no need when your whole site is one big lounge anyway).

But the damage is done. Thank you Rico, thank you Double-H, thank you me.

I've had many cats in my day. After reading Rico's post, I realized that only Men know how to name cats. I gave less is more names to mine too. "Pussy", "Kitty", "Girl", "Puppy", "Loud"... etc, etc.

Grandpa thalo is a plumber, I used to help him on jobs. We used to rip out walls and find mummified cats, mice, everything. There is nothing like crawling through some infested claustrophobic crawlspace with a flashlight, getting roaches crawling all in your business... and then the one thing your flashlight illuminates when there is no way to turn and flee, is this distorted mummified cat face with a horrible frozen dried expression... teeth bared and hollow eye sockets,

lol.

quote:
....the cat-free life is the life for me.
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I love dogs, but have a cat. How did this demanding cat ever enter my life, a creature I want to kick in the butt often especially when she puts her claws into my couch ready to shred same apart.

In the country a cat is the easiest thing to get, a perfect drop off place for unwanted and abandoned cats. I had already two cats (feral) until this one appeared starving, and I made error number one - I fed her, instead of setting a trap and taking her to the pound. After she ate, she proceeded to chase the other two cats away, who never where allowed to return due to her terrorist attacks upon them. This was the start of having a substitute for a demanding man, who is expensive to keep.

She is mostly Persian and they have charms, charms they are masters of. Like wanting to be petted constantly, sitting at my side and looking at me for hours with adoration, who needs this pesty intrusion upon one's mind . She loves men and rubs against them, rolls over and not one men has not stooped down stroking her belly. How slinkingly she walks; men label her as a member of a "French bordello. She thinks that by bringing me a gopher now and then, my love for her is everlasting. In the morning before I have my coffee, she insists to be fed first, or else she will make my life miserable with her irritating grating meows that drive me up the wall.

I feel so guilty, but this cat has got to go. Don't bet on it, because I am a sucker for this poor creature that has taken over my life.

Oh no, sister Freebird has resurrected the cat thread.

Not so free now, are ya? Spoiled Cat bondage, lol. I've been there.

Remember when a cat rubs against you, they are scent and territory marking. There are two sebaceous glads over their eyes, where the fur is a bit sparser. And one in the chin. When cats use these, they're adding their smell to YOU, almost as if to take possession of you, so you have a familiar smell.

When cats urinate or defacate in inappropriate places, it's definitely territory marking, using smell as a warning... cat repellent for other cats that may be rivals.

Cats don't look at us with adoration. Just calm regard. The are waiting for you to move, feed them, behave in some way that they can take advantage of. In the wild, lions will watch prey species calmly and intently for hours, until some signal is perceived that it's time to do something, usually exploit a weakness.

Cats are fascinating because they really do STUDY us. They become experts on human behavior. And so they know exactly how to behave to get reactions from you, so you'll feed them, pet them, behave in some interesting way for their entertainment, lol.

A cute story, Freebird.

I used to be deathly allergic to cats. But I never held that against them personally. I like cats even though it is quite true that they are arrogant and a bit standoffish compared to the average dog. When you come home at night, a dog will actually act like he or she has missed you. Cats can be affectionate as well, but more on their own schedule. And sometimes we might wonder why we would keep a pet at all if they don’t act the way we want them.

But cats will usually become extremely affectionate – just like a dog will – if you in turn give them lots of affection. It is in this way that cats are much more like people. A dog, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to have a large ego. There is no way you can snub it. A dog seem always ready to give you complete and total affection no matter how dull a person you may actually be. I don’t know if that makes dogs dumb or kind. But it’s one reason I like dogs.

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Cats are an alien species from another galaxy, planted here by extraterrestrials with a sense of humor.
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Dogs are domesticated fully, cats still are a bit wild. Housecats behave similarly to wild cats, more than dogs behave like wolves. A dog's pack instincts fit better with human society.

I've always considered cats much more low maintenance, because they remain less tamed. But both species can go totally feral and survive.

If you drop dead in your house, and nobody finds you, both your beloved cat, or man's best friend will eat your corpse without the slightest remorse as soon as they get hungry. When we start projecting human attributes on pets, I think it's a good idea to remember that simple fact.

If you drop dead in your house, and nobody finds you, both your beloved cat, or man's best friend will eat your corpse without the slightest remorse as soon as they get hungry.

LOL. I find that idea chilling in regards to cats. But from dogs, I would expect that. Heck, I might be a little disappointed if they didn't. Dogs eat their own crap. They will roll in the most disgusting and foul oders. And they seem to like taking a crap right in the middle of the street, at least one of my dogs liked doing that. They lick their balls. They sniff each other's butts. Why would I expect Rover not to eat me when I'm dead? But unlike that look in the eye a cat will give you sometimes, I don't think Rover is ever premeditatedly thinking about eating you when you're dead.

And maybe some dogs are different. Maybe some dogs really are man's best friend. I remember one particular dog of mine who would always stick by my side and lick my face if I got hurt riding my bike, or something like that, which seemed to happen a lot. I remember one time I was flat on my back on the concrete street after having just flipped over the top of my handlebars because the steering suddenly came loose while I was going down a hill. I wasn't hurt bad but I had the wind knocked out of me. So all I really needed was to be left alone to recoup, but my dog kept licking me in the face and I was pretty much powerless to stop him. Was he just tasting me perhaps, imagining that he could soon start tearing into my meaty thighs? Hindsight is 20/20. Now that I think of it, all that licking he was doing might have just been the doggie way of putting "dibs" on me in front of the other dogs in the neighborhood.

(I didn't write this.)

Excerpts from a Dog's Daily Diary:


8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!

9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!

9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!

10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!

12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!

1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!

3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!

5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!

7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!

8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!

11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary:


Day 683 of my captivity:

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the floor.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. The audacity!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow - but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded!

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe.... for now.
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Fantastic joke, Markle. I'm going to email that to a few friends.

Or is it a joke? That sounds pretty much like the thinking of both animals.

Markle enjoyed your post tremendously I am reminded of a day when my cat ran into the house with a field mouse and ate the whole mouse including tail; not one drop of blood to show this tragedy. How quickly our lives are swallowed up

Is it just my observation that cats are real keen on energies?, and they also love the heat of our bodies we leave behind when getting up from a couch or chair. Sometimes I play tug of war as to who gets the hot spot back again.

thalo, so it is not my good looks the cat adores, but just people watching to see what comes next. Thanks for filling me in on the rubbing against the body to mark it with their scents.

Hi everyone , I am resurrecting the cat topic since I had to euthanize my beloved cat "Majica". She was my buddy, my pet who reminded me daily that I was not solely living alone and was dependent upon her. Oh, her charming ways of endearment, her slinky sensuous walk and constant need for attention for stroking of her silky hair and demand for the most expensive cat food really got to me, never knowing how much until I brought her to the vet to be put to sleep, a month ago. Majica had progressive diabetes. I could have tried to give her two daily insulin shots and all that goes with caring for a diabetic patient. This option would have put me into another care giving position being totally obsessed with her needs and care. Instead I chose the other option and find that I have no regrets. At times she was a pain in the butt, yet there was a giving and sharing of love which brought such joy to my life. She was a stray whom I had adopted seven years ago.

A week after her death I sat in my apple orchard on a wooden bench that she often shared with me. As memories of her flooded before me, my heart ached so badly and felt like it literally opened so very wide and took her back within. I sobbed amd sobbed letting the tears flow freely until I was spent completely. I never could have imagined in a million years that I would be so deeply affected, and yet this little fluff cat had touched the very core of my being with her unconditional love. Fare thee well, my little Majica.

I had her cremated after learning from the vet that in todays society dead animals are now taken to the landfill and no longer receive a free cremation by the Humane Society. What a shock to learn of this insensitivity of our lack of caring for these helpless pets and strays.

"The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated." (Gandhi (1869-1948). How low have we sunk as a moral society. To set the record straight it is approximately 13,800 cats and dogs that are killed daily by the Human Society throughout our country and then thrown into the landfill. I was told that no fundings are available for cremation.

I hope everyone is doing well here on the forum. I have had little desire to dialogue and am spending time listening and learning from mother nature here on my property. What a teacher everything is!. Life and death are so intertwined, and we are such a great part of it all. With awe and wonder I gaze at the miracle of life and the many expressions of life that we all share together. In nature there is such harmony and balance. Everythings works together for good in the evolvement of us all.

I comforted a little fawn last week. Have no idea as to what happened to him as I heard a scream within my house which made me rush outside finding a sprawled out fawn. His mother walked away. I assessed the situation and from my medical knowledge knew that he was severely injured although he had no visible signs. I covered him with blankets for he was in shock and trauma. I stroked his head ever so gently and stayed at his side all the time thinking of what I would do next to alleviate his sufferings. Should I call the Wildlife Center, etc. went through my mind, all the while continuing my carresses on his head. After ten minutes he gave several kicks and then he expired. How merciful of mother nature. The doe, his mother came back after two hours and seeing that he was dead departed again. Usually these does kick their fawns when they are severely injured to put them out of their misery. It was not necesary.

I took the dead fawn and put him into my wheelbarrow to push him toward a clearing by my woods. I laid him there knowing it would be a matter of time before the vultures would assemble with their clean up crew, and so they came and did what they are conditioned to do eat the remains.

Yesterday I found in an outbuilding a perfect fossil of a baby fawn in perfect condtion. I cried looking at this image which had never taken his breath, the severed umbilical cord was still attached. How sad for this little one never to have run and played with the life fawns.

Hope all is well with all of you here on the forum. Love and blessings to you all.

quote:

In nature there is such harmony and balance. Everythings works together for good in the evolvement of us all.

Those familiar with my Thoreauesque imitations through my musings about nature know that I am not a cold, heartless bastard. I stand in awe of nature, probably more than airhead "green" radical environmentalists who seem to hate human kind and themselves more than they actually love nature. But there are two sides to nature. There are the sunsets and bunny tails. They are wonderful. And there is indeed a type of balance, and death is part of that equation. That should elicit thoughts of "No duh!" But what tends to happen when those things around us die, we get in touch with the truly sublime and horrifying thought of our own mortality. A lot of the sometimes anger-laced tears at funerals are because of how the dead have inconvenienced us, not least because they remind us that we will die too.

But only butchers, sociopaths, and sickos are filled with glee over death. However the universe is balanced, whatever its character and nature is at heart, we are beasts and scars on the world if we relish in death instead of mourning it. To not mourn death, even that of Ted Kennedy (at least with some feelings for the family he leaves behind) is the mark of a brute. And whether pushing kittens into a landfill with a bulldozer or socialist health care "death panels" coldly deciding our fate, most of us rightly are repulsed by such things. I'm actually at heart an animal rights nut in the sense that I'm all FOR non-lunatically promoting vegetarianism and for treating animals humanely, and if they are to be raised and slaughtered for eating, doing so humanely. But what separates me from the animal rights lunatics is that I don't think for a moment that I can ever live without consuming something else. It goes with the territory of living. I think a lot of animal rights nuts are searching for a utopia they will never find and simply end up hating humans as their disappointment with the imperfection of reality grows in them.

God, should he or she exist, knows that he or she has thrown us into a Darwinian world where we are first and foremost subject to the rules of the tooth and claw, as many a fawn has found out. As warm and fuzzy as those creatures are, they are food for others. Nature is remarkable and ghastly at the same time. That is where we find ourselves. And we are raised when we rise above this inherent brutality. That's what I think. And when we use its existence as an expedient excuse to be brutes ourselves, we have learned nothing, have been nothing but mindless impulses, and perhaps can't even be considered human.

Those fleeting and warm memories of fluffy bunnies, long dead, can seem like the worst sort of sentimental gibberish and indulgence. And sometimes I think it is. But in a world where even Buddhists in Sri Lanka are murderers, sentiment is sometimes all we have that separates us from fiends. The moral to this story? I don't have one. Sorry about your cat.